Tribute to The Second Amendment

BANG BANG YOU'RE DEAD

Dedicated in Fear to the NRA

I was broke

and so was my car,

I put out the word

that I was a star.

With words that is

a poetry machine,

I'll write anything

forget the dream.

I got the call

from a magazine,

asked me to cover

a gun show scene.

In Salt Lake City

a weapons' fest,

three whole days

Baddest-of-the-Best.

Money wasn't much

they paid the gas,

a couple of burgers

fifty in cash.

I hit the road

with my Shooters' Bible,

my laptop slung

digging my survival.

With guns & words

had it all buffed,

baddest in the West

humpin'  so tough.

I learned the talk

along with the walk,

a paranoid's stalk

cocked-'n'-rocked.

There's two kinds of Uzi's

a Galil .223,

A Bush Master Mama

will set you free.

The AK-47

hottest in the show,

fully automatic

fires in the snow.

800 rounds a minute

you gotta be fast,

line up the children

give them a blast.

Suck on the barrel

destroy their dreams,

find some poets

they're smithereens.

Hump to McDonalds

gather up the kids,

take no prisoners

kill a few Yids.

Guns-R-Us

it's the American Dream,

the NRA 

rules supreme.

I hit the Scene

packing-to-blow,

The Mountain West's

fastest gun show.

Stopped at the door

by a .44 mag,

demanded my pass

would I kiss the flag.

You betchur boots

I replied,

pass me the banner

rap it in pride.

I paid my dues

got certified,

blessed in blood

and sanctified.

God Almighty

there's ten thousand guns,

like a holy war

only more fun.

Rednecks galore

no one's banned,

even the Dukes

from the Klu Klux Klan.

Along came the bikers

riding their hogs,

chicks on the rear

& their junk yard dogs.

Pit bulls with AIDS

dancing their cocks,

roosters in drag

packing gun jocks.

Next came the Libbers

armed with fear,

don't mess with us

check out the mirror.

We've been tattooed

with fists and ink,

get close to us

you'll eat our stink.

We're Lady McDeath

and Mama Queen Bash,

spin on this

stick it in your ass.

Along came the preachers

black suit and ties

weapons-at-arms

to collect their tithe.

The Avenging Angels

old time Mormons,

mess with us

we're Stormin' Norman.

It lasted three days

these super men,

even the chicks

from the hooters' den.

Last came the hunters

their eagle eyes,

bear claws and racks

fucking their prize.

"If it flies, it dies"

came their motto,

they won the west

there's no tomorrow.

The buffalo's gone

most of the game,

there ain't much left

so what's your name?

"Buy more weapons!"

came the roar,

the gun makers' yell

pumping their wars.

"Sell! Buy! Sale!

before their banned,

Obama's vendetta

against our Land.

Stand up and fight

it's American born,

start with the Redcoats

on to Desert Storm.

It's like cocaine

there's never enough,

gotta have more

to be that tough.

Shoot up with gun oil

and kiss the flag,

hump our pickups

stomp some fags!

Praise to the Uzi

the Galil .223,

A Bush Master Mama

I'll need all three.

A case of ammo

fifty grenades,

one never knows

the end of the parade.

Guns-R-Us

it's the American Dream,

The NRA 

rules supreme.

There's two kinds of Uzi's

a Galil .223,

A Bush Master Mama

will make you free.

The AK-47

the hottest to go,

fully automatic

lit up the show.

Our sacred right

that's our stake,

the Second Amendment

God's rattle snake.

Guns-R-Us

and The American Way,

God Bless America

and The NRA.

Gino Sky - December, 2012

Hunting Season

We've had deer running through our yard ever since we moved up to Northcliffe (no dog to chase them away).  But rarely do we see a buck.  This one appeared just after hunting season, apparently now free to roam.

Eyeballs

Recently I participated in a macular degeneration study up at the Moran Eye Center.  I don't have the problem...  I was a "control" subject.  Thought I was gonna get a big hunk of money for volunteering (not really), and I should have, considering all the tests I went through, but all I got was a really good eye exam and a pirate eye patch (too late for halloween).  I shouldn't complain...after all the tests, my eyes look in excellent shape.  So I thought I'd share a couple of eyeball pics with you.  Don't know what the pics mean, but the eyes are healthy (click for a bigger image).

Travels With Lacey--Wine Country

We had some time before we were due in Santa Barbara, so we decided to drive inland over the hills to Paso Robles.  Willis had said the area was famous for its Zin, definitely something to check out.

The drive through the hills was quite pleasant, but things were very dry...  Then we found a collection of one of my favorite things...  old trucks!

We arrived in Paso Robles and enjoyed a walk around the center of town and the little old ladies who ran a town museum in the old library.  Then we went exploring the area.  Lacey dropped me off at the airport where there was a car museum and a airplane museum...  then went off shopping!

The car museum displayed a collection of cars owned by a local entrepreneur...  He had one big surprise for me...  a gullwing Mercedes 300!  What a rare find...

Besides owning everything else in town, this guy also had a winery...  with deliveries formerly done with an REO Speedwagon!

The War Birds Museum had a collection of old jet fighters, kinda worn out, but they were trying to restore them.  My favorite plane was the old DC-3 gooneybird...

Lacey picked me up and we decided it was time to do the obligatory winery visit.  Close by was a fine establishment with patient help (the place was yet to get busy).  We sampled til we got a good buzz, then bought everything in sight!  We retired to their outdoor plaza for a bit of lunch and a search for a good motel.  Amazingly, using an old ID which I won't reveal at this time, we scored an incredible deal at the finest place in town.  Besides a fine room and beautiful grounds, it had its own weather station (I never found the "rock").

 Since we were back in the center of town, we could walk to a restaurant and hit a winery store front on the way.  Again, getting a buzz, we bought up the place, then was directed out the back door to an alley where we found one of those "organic" places" and had an incredible meal.  Just check out this appetizer, think we didn't order that up right now?

"Braised Lentil Tacos, Ginger-Carrot Puree, Candied Jalapenos, Cashews & Coconut, Watermelon, Cilantro"

Again, incredible.

The next day was off to Santa Barbara, where we drank up all the wine we bought and had another great meal dished up by Chef Rob.  And then finally back to Orange County.

Final pic...  this little guy was so cute...

That ends Travels With Lacey...  a fine, fine adventure...

Travels With Lacey--Back to Morro Bay

Leaving the Hearst Castle grounds, we drove to a nearby ocean overlook in search of the elephant seals.  Sure enough, there they were, laying around on the beach (and cavorting with each other out in the water...  I swear, they were "doing the thang..."  But I only got a pic of them enjoying the post coital...

Then is was back to Morro Bay, which we felt deserved a little more discovery.  We had just enough time to catch our favorite representative at the local Chamber of Commerce office.  Sure enough, she enthusiastically gave us way more info on restaurants and places to stay then we could absorb...  what fun!  Anyway, we got a decent place to stay and headed to a nearby restaurant just in time for the fog to roll in.  What a great table with a terrific view...  of nothing!  But before the fog, I did get a shot of my buddy pelican and the seal "island" out in the bay.

Predictions were for more fog the next day, dampening our visit to Morro Bay.  However, I woke the next morning to an absolutely glorious sunshiny day, with vestiges of the full moon sinking behind Morro Rock.

I took a wonderful walk along the docks and found a cute park of kids at the far end...

After breakfast, it was off to find a winery...

Travels With Lacey--Perving at the Castle

We finally reached the Hearst Castle, a goal of Lacey's for many years.  $25/ea/tour, 3 different tours...  crazy, Hearst makes more money from tours than the newspaper biz...  Anyway, the castle is a magnificent example of conspicuous consumption...  those Deer Valley homes with their $19K refrigerators don't even come close.

There were so many photo ops, I didn't know where to start.  But then I noticed quite a collection of marble statues spread around the grounds and inside some of the "common" areas.  So the perv in me took over...  Get ready,  hormone rates are about to explode...

 And on to the show...

This one above was pretty funny...  many women in the tour just had to sit next to it and strike the pose... while their partners snapped their pics.

Orgy time around the pool...

I've got more than this next guy...

Is the above what they call homoerotic???

Ok, now just to cool off a little, a few other pics of things I found interesting...  First, a feature on the walls of the "home theater"...

Now a place setting at the master dinner table...  note the mustard and ketchup bottles...

A neat Chinese lamp...

A way cool Deco clock (I really wanted this, tried to sneak it under my coat but was caught and sentenced to do this blog)...

And now our tour guide (!?!) posing with some of the outdoor features found on the guest buildings around the castle...

This next pic is kinda weird...  don't know how to explain it...

And, finally, a neat mosaic...

And that concludes this tour of the Hearst Castle...  I have to admit, it was quite worth seeing, even though it's out of my price range...  And I have to give Hearst some credit, he's given the castle and thousands of acres around the castle to the State of California for preservation.